I don’t own the Ronins. Happy?

Ryo hears someone knocking at the door and opens it:

Ryo: "Talpa!" Prepares to armor up. The other Ronin Warriors hear that name and all rush into the living room, in their subarmors. Ryo is already in his.

Talpa: “No! No! I'm not here to fight you! I want to move in!”

Kento: “Why would you want to do that for?"

Cye: “Yeah, you hate us! “

Talpa: “True, true. But I need a place to stay.. “

Sage: “Why? You belong in the Netherrealm."

Talpa sighs. Talpa: I can't go back there.

Rowen: “Why not? The Gates won't open up for ya? “

Talpa: “No! That's not why I can't go back!”

Ryo: “Then why?”

Talpa mumbles.

Sage: “What?"

Talpa: “I said because I lost a stupid bet to the Warlords!”

Kento laughs. “You and the Warlords made a bet?!”

Talpa grumbles. “Yeah!”

Cye scratches his head in confusion. “OK, then.”

Rowen shakes his head. “Sorry, Talpa, but we're not buying this. How do we know this ain't just some trick to capture us?”

Talpa: “You have your armors, the inferno, the Jewel of Life, and the Monk's Staff. You could easily beat me!”

Ryo: “I couldn't agree with him more!”

Sage: “So do we tell him no?”

Talpa pouts.

Rowen: “I still think he's lying!”

Cye: “Hold on, mates! Let's call the Warlords and ask them!”

It was agreed and Cye called the Warlords. A few minutes later he hung up.

Ryo: “Well?”

Cye: “The Warlords and Talpa got into a huge battle. And they made a bet out of it. If Talpa won, the Warlords would serve him again, and fight against us. If the Warlords won, Talpa has to live with us for a week, and cannot harm us at all, otherwise the Warlords would be on him!”

Rowen and Kento snort, and Sage rolls his eyes.

Ryo looks at Talpa. “I guess we have no choice then. Come on in Talpa.”

Talpa looks around at everything. He points at everything. “What's this? What's that? Is this a weapon?”

Ryo tries to be patient. Ryo: “That's a TV, that's the phone. No, that isn't a weapon! It's a remote control to the TV.”

Sage: “This is going to be a long week!”

Rowen: “I say after this all over, we kill the Warlords!”

Both Sage and Rowen share evil grins. Hm, what are they planning?

Talpa pushes a button on the stereo. “What's this do?”

Cye: “Talpa, no!”

Loud music blares to life, rocking the whole house. Rowen, Sage, Cye, and Ryo cover their ears. Talpa jumps into Kento's lap. “MOOOOOOOMMMMMMY!”

Ryo goes over to the stereo, grimacing. He shuts it off, then turns and glares at Talpa.

Talpa looks down. “I'm sorry!”

Ryo: “Talpa next time check to see if the volume is up or down.”

Talpa scratches his helmet covered head, looking confused. “OK.”

Cye: “Thank God Mia's not here!”

Rowen: “Yeah, she would have killed us!”

Kento: “I'm hungry!”

Cye is making dinner now. Ryo, Rowen, and Sage are in the living room. They are trying to figure out how to get rid of Talpa.

Rowen: “I say we create the Inferno and blast him!”

Sage: “I say we take a very large axe, chop him into tiny little pieces, and recycle it all! Hey, you can make money that way.”

Ryo: “Could always let White Blaze eat him.”

All: “Hmmmmmm.”

In the kitchen both Kento and Talpa are watching Cye cook.

Kento comes closer to Cye. Cye grabs his frying pan. WHACK! Kento falls to the floor unconscious.

Talpa stares down at Kento. Cye continues to cook. Talpa comes closer. “What are you doing, Torrent?"

Cye: “Cooking. And my name is Cye.”

Talpa: “If you say so, Torrent.”

WHACK!

Talpa falls to the floor. Looks up in surprise. Cye glares down at him.

Cye: “Call me that again, and I'll knock your bloody head off!”

Ryo, Rowen, and Sage run into the kitchen. They see Kento lying unconscious on the floor.

Ryo: “Talpa, you're going to pay this!”

Talpa: I didn't do it!

Rowen: “Yeah right, and I'm Janet Jackson!”

Sage: “Janet Jackson?”

Rowen shrugs.

Ryo sees Cye holding his frying pan high above his head. “Uh, Cye?”

Cye: “Get that bloody monster out of my kitchen before I turn him into scrap metal!”

No one wants to mess with an angry Cye! Sage grabs Kento, and Ryo and Rowen escort Talpa out of the kitchen.

Cye: “Thank you!”

Kento wakes up and groans. “My head!” Goes downstairs. Ryo, Sage, Rowen, and Talpa look at him.

Ryo: “Oh, hey, Kento. Cye's almost done with dinner.”

Kento: “Eeep!” Heads for phone.

Sage: “What are you doing?”

Kento: “Calling 1-800-2000-Jenny!”

Ryo, Rowen, and Sage all faint.

Talpa laughs.

Kento's confused. “What'd I say?!”

Next day Talpa bursts into Ryo's room and jumps on his bed.

Ryo: “AUGH!”

Talpa:“Wakey! Wakey!”

Ryo stares up at him, and narrows his eyes. “What are you wearing?”

Talpa: “A pretty pink robe! Strata said it would match my armor!”

Ryo hears someone whistling the innocence song. Ryo cracks a smile, then began to laughs.

Talpa frowns. “What's so funny?”

Ryo: “Uh, Talpa, that's not a robe! That is a woman's nightgown! And that one belongs to Mia!”

Sage comes in. “Yeah, and she has to wear a robe over it! If you weren't wearing that armor you'd be showing everything!”

Talpa cries.

Ryo and Sage sweatdrop.

Cye and Kento come in.

Cye: “What's wrong?”

Kento: “What is Talpa wearing?!”

Talpa: “Just say it, Hardrock! Just say it!”

Hardrock shrugs. “OK. It.”

Talpa is confused.

Cye laughs, shakes his head, and leaves. Kento follows, and then looks back. “Oh, uh, Talpa, lose the nightgown. Not your style!” Kento leaves the room.

Talpa growls angrily as Ryo and Sage snicker.

Ryo, Rowen, Kento, Cye, and Sage are outside standing on the dock. They are still trying to figure out how to get rid of Talpa.

Sage: “I still say we should chop him into pieces and take them to the recycling center!”

Rowen: “Yeah, they could build a rocket out of them!”

Cye: “He's worse than Kento!”

Kento: “Hey!”

Cye: “I can't even cook without him asking what everything is!”

Ryo: “If I remember correctly, you bashed him yesterday, Cye.”

Cye shrugs.

Kento: “So what do we do?”

Rowen brightens. “Let's take him into the city and lose him!”

Ryo: “Oh, sure, Rowen, and scare the entire city?”

Rowen blushes. “Oh, whoops!”

Kento: “And he's suppose to be the genius of the group.”

Cye: “I say we find the Warlords, calmly walk up to them, and then grab all four by their hair and kick their bloody asses!”

Ryo, Rowen, Sage, and Kento stare in shock.

Ryo: “Kento, run back to the manor and grab some rope and the duct tape!”

Kento: “To tie up the Warlords, or Talpa?”

Ryo: “No! To tie down Cye! I think he's blowing a gasket!”

Cye is growling angrily.

Just then they see Mia's jeep coming.

Sage: “Uh oh!”

Rowen: “With any luck she can get rid of Talpa!”

Cye: “And then we kill the Warlords!”

Ryo: “Come on, guys. Better to get this done now rather than later!”

They head up the hill. Mia, Yulie, and White Blaze are climbing out of the jeep. White Blaze rubs against Ryo.

Mia and Yulie: “Hi, guys.”

Ronins: “Uh, hi.”

Mia: “Alright, what are you five hiding?”

They all look at one another, wondering who would be the one to tell her.

Mia: “Well?!”

Ryo: “Uh, Mia. The Warlords made a bet, and well, now Talpa is staying here.”

Mia: “WHAT!” She storms to the mansion. The Ronins, Yulie, and White Blaze follow behind. They go inside.

Talpa: “Miss Koji! Hi!”

Mia grabs Talpa. “You are leaving now! Yulie, use the Jewel to open the Gates!”

Yulie does, and Mia throws Talpa through the Gates. “Good-bye!” Talpa is gone, and the gate closes.

Mia turns around, seeing the Warlords and Kayura appear. Mia glares at all ten of them.

Yulie: “Yipes!” Hides with White Blaze behind couch.

All: “Uh oh!”

Mia: “You have exactly five seconds!”

All turn and run out the door, with Mia hot on their trail. She picks up rocks and throws them at them. Ryo got hit in the side. Sage got hit in the back. Kento got hit in the ass. Cye got hit in the shoulder. Rowen got hit in the head. Kayura got hit in the leg. Dais got hit in the neck. Anubis got hit in the elbow. Cale got hit in his ankle. Sekhmet got hit in the face.

The moral of this story? Never let Talpa move in with you, even if your former enemies make a bet out of it, cause Mia will just get on your ass about it!